Too much use of “the proposal”, it became tedious to read. Much of the information before Research Background is unnecessary, in particular the section titled Proposal Structure (you don’t need to tell the reader you are going to review literature, discuss expected results and implications). What is the purpose of the Research Philosophy section? You have a bit of work ahead in terms of citing prior research. From the material so far I understand that you want to investigate engagement, however the manner in which you intend to do so in unclear. Moving forward: how are you going to define and measure engagement? What factors are you going to measure to see if they are related to engagement? **Need to input surveys, field studies or quantitative data**
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